december 31st, 2003 (new year’s)
i’m listening to… some jin song my brother is playing [hip-hop].
i’m feeling… sleepy, although i shouldn’t be.
3:33 pm — word up. what’d y’all do for new year’s eve?
mine was interesting… me, jeanette, and gerrine met up at sherry‘s house in danville and then we went to pick up some alcohols… 12-pack of coronas and a bottle of bacardi limon (which was disgusting… although the last time i drank it, it tasted great :|). meh, i can smell the alcohol in my nose. GROSS.
anyway, after that we went to sherry’s apartment in berkeley and just sat around and drank a little… and then we took the bart to san francisco… to embarcadero. man, the bart was like a fucking PARTY… in the bart station some crazy ass indian guys told us to jump in their picture, and we did, and then they were like, “are you going to sf? we should hang out” and jeanette was like, “no”… lol. but one of them ended up putting his arms around her waist and stuff and she didn’t say anything lol. WAL.
then on the first train we got on, i sat down next to this black guy named “J-LOVE”… lol… i guess he just got out of five years in jail for drug trafficking, and he was just like drinking remy on the bart and offering it to everyone hah. and he busted flows for us, and it was kind of cool… and he told us to be on the lookout for him when his album drops. har. we’ll see!!
and then we changed trains and then we met a whole bunch of other people that were drinking on the bart and this one guy lit up a blunt too lol… nice!
when we got off at embarcadero, the fireworks were nice, but it started raining @ like 12… bOoOo… we met up with jeanette’s lil bro alex, and some other paphi’s andy and david… everyone was hella cool except for david… he was retarded… one of those “i am too cool for this shit” type of people… bOo, no me gusta. like i had those little firecrackers that you throw on the ground and they explode, and he was too cool to even take one of those. he was the only one. what a loser. i hate people like that. :X but yeah alex was trying to convince me that it didn’t hurt to break one of those in your hands, so i broke one (you stick it between your fingers and then snap your fingers), and it hurt. but not as much as you would think.
so, we decided to get a ride back with them… walked like 15 blocks… took us like half an hour to get to the car. he got valet parking man… hukkkkk… T__T we crammed seven people into this car… it was fun. not really. actually, it wasn’t that uncomfortable, though. we got back to sherry’s apartment and nelson, richard, and jason were there… and we drank some more and people smoked some (although they smoked before heetae got there and it was his weed, so he was kinda mad)… and then heetae, phil [wu], and josh appeared and there was more smoking and stuff… blah, blah… lots of drinking i think i should stop drinking vodka because i always get a weird reaction after i drink vodka, but yesterday i drank rum and everything was a-ok. :X
but yeah we just sat around and talked about stupid stuff… it was good times blah, blah, blah!!!!!!!! all the guys who were there who we knew but didn’t really know thought the apt was mine, lol… i’m not quite sure why… perhaps because i was the only girl really still drinking and getting them cups and shit like that. i don’t know. -__-’ it wasn’t the most LIVELY event, but i was amused, and at least me and gerrine didn’t have to take care of puking people this time, HAR HAR HAR. ^^”
december 30th, 2003 (the key to snowboarding)
i’m listening to… my brother playing tiger woods… -__-”
i’m feeling… sore… almost.
the piece of shit computer we have at home that i am currently typing on is a 448 mhz pentium 3. KILL ME. IT’S HORRIBLE. and my parents refuse to spend money for an upgrade X_x ^_x ^_^
11:54 pm — mmm tomorrow is going to be sore death. went snowboarding @ boreal today with sherry, jeanette, jeremy, phil, jason, and adriel. hahaha it was adriel’s first time snowboarding in like seven years… and omfg, it was pain (for him, but also for us). we waited for him for SOOOOOO long… and went on two runs in two hours time. jason went on one (cause he was waiting for him). oh my lord… and so adriel tried, but every time he tried to get up, he’d fall back down, and he’d sit there for another five minuts before trying again. yeah, everyone gets frustrated the first time (cause snowboarding is pain), but if you pay $70 for that shit, you better fucking try to enjoy it!!! so yeah, he went down one run in two hours and then went to go sit in the lodge for the rest of the four hours or so we were there. WAL (what a loser). but yeahhhh it was fucking great… DEFINITELY one of the best snowboarding trips i’ve ever had. the weather was amazing (sunny, except for like an hour and a half when it was lightly snowing), it was all powder (it snowed HELLA last night), there was great company (i’ve missed some of those fuckers!), i was using new boots that don’t cut off circulation to my feet like my old ones, andddd! i have finally learned the key to being a good snowboarder… it was hella powdery today so i wasn’t really scared to fall (or at least not as much as usual)… and i discovered FEARLESSNESS and DRAMATIC MOVEMENTS are what it takes. if you think you’re going to fall all the time, you will. but if you don’t think about it… you improve a lot (says i, who ate the snow so many times, but nevertheless…)… and as for the dramatic movements… seems like the harder you make turns when you carve the better chance you have. meh, my board is too long though, so it moves hella friggin fast. scary as fauk. and annoying. and oOh! i finally did a few jumps… yey! first time. i wanted to try grinding, but i feared slipping and falling and killing myself should have tried, though… dammit. there was also this little metal bar that was easy and there was no way of killing myself by going on it, but dammit, i didn’t see it until after i passed it. but dammmmnnnn fun. i hope we get to go back up on friday. ^__^ (friday = $10 student lift tickets!!)! but yeh, the key to snowboarding is probably the key to life too… HMM TRICKY!!
watched “big fish” with xinlei, fontaine, claire, and fontaine’s boyfriend last night. IT WAS A FUCKING WEIRD MOVIE. it’s one of those movies that you watch, say WTF all through-out it, and then leave saying, “i don’t know what to think of it”… cause it wasn’t BAD, but it was just so… odd. but yeah, that whole movie made me think a lot more about being an old fart and dying and stuff… AGAIN BLAH. BLAH!!!
afterwards we went to room with a cue to meet up with dahye, david [shibata], richard [lee], and albert… and they were having karaoke night (which is odd, because i didn’t know white people did karaoke that often :X) and so claire and i decided to sing “torn” by natalie imbruglia… OMFG it’s so fucking scary… there were like seventy or so people there (i’m bad @ guestimating that kind of shit though)… and good god it was scary… i could sing on key, but i couldn’t even control my voice and it was shaking so much… ugh… so scary. yet… interesting. i’d do it again, probably. singing is so great. T__T
i’ve been reading a LOT this break. lots of magazines, some chinese-american novel about that cultural revolution that my mom’s co-worker gave her (forgot the name of it :|), “fast-food nation”, and i’m almost done with “diary” by chuck palahniuk, which sherry bought me for christmas. he’s amazing, by the way, so if you haven’t read his books, READ SOME. he’s the guy who wrote “fight club”, which puts him on a whole nother plane just because. i also re-started writing my uh novel… not the one between me and sherry (who knows what will happen with that), but my own… umm, yeah, probably won’t be finished until i do some more growing up, though. ^__~
i am broke as a joke dude. where does all the fukkin money go?! time to work me arse off when i go back to washington, and like, actually save up money (for a laptop)… ARGHLE! gargle! although saving up money probably won’t work too hot, as it is snowboarding season and i have dreams of going every week… and like… concerts… and FOOD. fooood. yeah, well, the rest of this break in cali, i’m going to do inexpensive things. argh. sanjOoOod. GOOD FUCKING TIMES.
although saving up money probably won’t work too hot, as it is snowboarding season and i have dreams of going every week… and like… concerts… and FOOD“
You better believe it. Every week! Concerts too… but not every week otherwise I’ll be broke even more so than I already am.
december 28ht, 2003 (fleting…)
i’m listening to… my brother playing tiger woods…
10:05 pm — went to a memorial service with my brother and phil [wu] today… it was for pastor chiu, who passed away like… last last week? last week? i don’t know. to be honest, it was really boring, but only because we were outside (it was way packed and overcrowded) and we couldn’t get into the sanctuary… so we couldn’t hear anything. at first i tried, but then i just didn’t really care. it’s sad though… :/ that everyone has to come and go and it is all just so fleeting. who knows how much time there is to really make an impact and really show people you’re worth something, and to show that you care… MEH… this is the closest i’ve ever gotten to a funeral (and this is by no means close at all), but i am already so close to losing someone who actually means something to me… my grandma will probably last a couple more months… she already can’t do anything for herself… and can’t talk… she understands some stuff though… but it’s just so godamn sad… :/ bah… yeah… there were so many people at the memorial… like 600+ because the sanctuary holds that many and the people couldn’t even fit into the sanctuary… wow, to make that kind of impact. i really do find it amazing that he lived for god his whole life and that at the end he really, honestly did not fear dying. that’s faith… hard to imagine having that kind of love and devotion for god… he even endured 3 1/2 years of persecution in china for preaching the gospel… i don’t know if it was all in vain or not, but he was a damn happy guy and lived a full life… just… sad.
december 27th, 2003 (+ sweatdrop)
i’m listening to… nothing.
i’m feeling… okie dokie.
12:46 am — just got back from tapioca express with sherry, jeanette, phil [nho], dave [lee], and grant (whom i also have not really seen in a while). wOot. tried to go to the boba place in dublin first but eh that was like… closed… and stuff. ;[ so we took three cars to milpitas, which is like, inefficiency to the maximus, but w/e! --'' it was fun times... lots of fun with the digi-cams and funny faces HWAR HWAR HWAR. and as always, jeanette's stories that... aren't really stories. =X ^^'' *sweatdrop*.
earlier in the day i went with dave and dahye to hayward where we went to the korean market and got fattening food (huk T_T) and rented these korean movies... the first was "nabi (butterfly)" and the second was "my tutor friend"... "NABI" (which was DAVE'S SELECTION) was seriously one of the worst movies i've ever seen in my LIFE. the scenes were all strung together without much thought or reasoning and the main characters (it was supposed to be an action-love story) had NO depth at ALL... you didn't care about them at all and they would all be crying and stuff and you'd just be like... eh. it was a HORRENDOUS movie. and like four hours long too... never ended... dave is never picking a movie again. -__- especially since he's a guy and he only watches romantic comedies now... um... WHO ARE YOU!? X: the other movie, "my tutor friend" was a romantic comedy and it was actually pretty funny... X: really out-there. mmmm... yeah enough korean movies for the rest of my life though... after watching "nabi" i never wanted to watch a korean movie again. --''
december 26th, 2003 (rawr)
i'm listening to... my brother and his friend playing "celebrity deathmatch" on ps2... why, i do not know.
i'm feeling... sort of sleepy, but i want to stay up to watch "28 days later".
12:35 am -- hmm today was the epitome of every break summed up into one day. in the morning we went after-christmas shopping @ stoneridge mall with sherry and jeanette... saw xinlei and my mom there too heh O: after that we went to dublin hacienda center to do some more shopping and then we were supposed to do even MORE, but i didn't return half the shit i needed to because the after-christmas lines were way too huge to deal with... bleh. zany brainy is closing down though, so i got allen [ma]‘s christmas present and this neato lantern set thing TEEHEE.
@ night went to go play pool and drink boba with dahye, fontaine, claire, xinlei, and claire’s friend justin and his friend ryan (who for some reason both me and dahye thought was named mike… go figure?!). claire thought justin was hella hawt cause he’s like this white skater dude… but he’s whatevers… i thought ryan was a lot cooler too because he actually like… talked. lol. O__o and justin just kind of had a blank stare the whole time and said like three sentences maybe. maybe he is just a quieter type of person… who knows. rawr.
yesterday was christmas… really didn’t feel like much this year. i sort of cleaned my room, though, and found this exciting pair of maroon sort-of-like-snowboarding-pants-but-not-pants that i bought like… four years ago… AND THAT WAS EXCITING ^__^ especially cause they still fit. although most of my clothes still fit… although a lot of them are a little too small or a little too big because i’m constantly fluctuating between fatnesses and skinnenesses. O__x this trip home has = lots of food which = fatnesses. XD didn’t really get any exciting presents this year… i can’t diffrenciate what is a christmas and what is a birthday present, so w/e… between the both of these dates i got (from my family) a wacom tablet and $200, and (from my friends) some little notebooks and stuff, a bag, a coolio beanbag pillow that they sell in brookstone now but that is from japan, the new chuck palahnuik book “diary” (yay!), some personalized songs *cough har har har*, a couple cd’s, and some other stuff i have yet to recieve ^__^ cool enough.
finally going to go snowboarding next tuesday (the 30th)… fucking hell yeah. ABoOT TIME MAN. seen a lot of fOolios i haven’t seen for a while this break… jon [toy] (4 years), tomiko (a year? iono), dave [lee] (1 year), diana (probably like 3 years)… cool seeing old folkers. ^^ some more. but my brain has died on me. =)
so yeah everyone around me in california – school friends and church friends – are in like serious relationships, and i’m the only loser who hasn’t had one, lol. sometimes i really really want someone, but then when i think about it, i don’t want someone who would put a limit on the people i’m allowed to see and the things i’m allowed to do. ideally, a “good boyfriend” wouldn’t put limits on those things, but who knows where the hell THOSE guys are… cause i sure don’t see them. =) we’re too young to be tied down, i think that’s for sure. X__x but maybe i’m just saying that because i don’t have those things… HWAR HWAR HWAR.
december 23rd, 2003 (asuidhasuidhad)
i’m listening to… the computer humming.
i’m feeling… shamed and like i should just give myself an honorable death like a samurai -__-
1:35 am — just saw “the last samurai”, which, like everyone has said, was surprisingly good. ARRRGH. i hope it wasn’t historically accurate because it made me come out feeling just BAD, esp since the samurai were just so like… beautiful. not a very masculine word, but whatever the fuck… i kind of wish it had no attraction / kissing / lovey dovey scenes though, but actually, they kept that to a minimum, which is very un-hollywood-like, so i guess i am proud of them. it was good. not one of my favorites, but definitely among the better of the war-type-flicks (blahblahblah).
my grades are so bad i am going to diziiiiieeeee… i’m surprised my GPA isn’t a lot lower than it is cause OMFG. godammit. kill me. parents are going to kill me.
went to haight-ashbury with jeanette and xinlei today… jeanette is a shopping whore. it wasn’t as exciting as i thought it was, and i didn’t get my demonia shoes, godammit. nowhere has my demonia shoes. i am bittar @ life. WOW I JUST LOOKED AND I AM AMAZING… I’VE NEVER GOTTEN OVER A 3.0 IN MY WHOLE COLLEGE CAREER SO FAR AND 3.0 IS THE HIGHEST I HAVE GOTTEN… WOW I SUCK. godammit… -__-
we went to pastor wayne’s house @ night for dinner (which was yummy, cause they say “he is a gourmet chef”, and then to movie and then BLEH. kireh.
december 22nd, 2003 (tales of drunken stupor)
i’m listening to… the television (“charmed” is on).
i’m feeling… okay. -__-
6:33 pm — my parents want me to go to beijing university this summer to study chinese… it’s like an eight week program from june 27th to mid-august… study chinese and they take you around china for two weeks. $3,000-something bucks, not including airfare. would anyone like to join? ^^ $200 or something bucks off if three people join together. rawr ~ but yeah, i’m down to go, because my chinese is teh sux again >__< and i’ve never been to that part of china… so… yeah. i still want to go to italy the most though. dammit. -__-
anyway, yesterday (the 21st) was chock full of drunken… fun, or lack thereof. ummm during the morning went to church… BAH… never going again… fucking boring as hell. i hate church. and like, the whole english service has been taken over by one of our church families… three of them on the worship team (out of five people), and one of them as the… spokesperson… er, i dunno the title. -__- announcement-maker-dude. twas just really different from before, and too uncontemporary to be entertaining @ all. even praise was not that entertaining, and that is usually the best part. meh. no more church for me -__-
after that went to the mall with sherry, jeanette, tin-win, and karen and got treated to lunch @ california pizza kitchen… it’s good, i guess, whatever, pizza is not that exciting of a foods. -__- i’ve been eating nonstop as of late -__-” rawr. fatness. but yummy fatness! -__-
came home, slept for some hours, ate dinner, and then decided to go to DA CLUB with sherry and jeanette and gerrine… here comes the pain train. -__- on the way to jeanette’s, a cop pulled me over and it freaked me the fuck out, but he was really nice and was only telling me that my front right headlight was out. whew. -__-’ probably will need to go fix it tomorrow. good thing i got pulled over BEFOREHAND and not afterwards *cough.
after we got to jeanette’s, sherry lent me a cool black top (wOosa) and then we went to DA CLUB in san francisco (after getting a teeny bit lost)… club whisper… which gerrine claims looks like a furniture store, and it does… and it’s really like a warehouse or something. i dunno… looked ghetto on the outside, but it was okay on the inside O__o” hella small inside though… which was REALLY odd since it looked like there were just sooo many people and cars there and there weren’t THAT many. o__O *confrOoze.
so me, jeanette, sherry, and gerrine divided up an eighth of vanilla vodka amongst the four of us and then like 1/2 of a water bottle of malibu rum… surprisingly, the vodka was GOOD and the malibu was FUCKING DISGUSTING (and we even drank that after we were DRUNK). we got into the VIP line but then jeanette had to wait for her friend, and we went back to the car to get her cellphone and call her friend… and me and gerrine peed in the streets and we all drank some more -__- WHICH SHOULD NOT HAVE BEEN DONE. at least not for some of us! when we got back in line after jeanette’s friend came, the bouncer wouldn’t let sherry in because she was piss drunk and couldn’t even stand up straight… and jason and nelson ended up showing up and helped us out for a while… nelson carried her for a while lol. she puked A LOT… D: i’ve seriously never seen anyone puke so much in my life man. so she was puking, puking, a little of it got on jeanette’s car… and then jeanette went in for a little while but she said she just stood @ the front door most of the time waiting for us… and then she came back out and that meant she couldn’t go back in… :X and she ended up passing out in the car with sherry. how the two of them got so drunk… no one knows. at least jeanette didn’t puke, though. at some point jason called me to go get his jacket because it was hella hot inside and like… i accidentally went to the wrong area and sat on puke. bleh.
when i came back, gerrine was walking towards my direction and she was like, “let’s just go in because sherry is being a brat”… cause i guess sherry was telling her “don’t fucking give me any more fucking water; just fucking leave me alone”… because gerrine kept giving her water since she was puking so gawdamn much (once again, how this happened i do not know / understand… probably because she didn’t eat dinner :|)
so me and gerrine went inside and talked to fOols for a little while outside and then went inside to dance… and all the guys looked the same and were all greasy… it was a pi alpha phi (asian fraternity) party, so yeah… … … saw tomiko there though! lol. funneh. O__o the thing ended @ two, and the DJ was horrendous… and played a lot of like… reggae music towards the end. we only went inside for like 45 minutes though, so things actually kinda worked out cool, because i think if i had been in there since we got there (like 11:00 – 2:00), i would have DIEDDDDDDD. cause da club = da sux… unless you have A LOT OF ALCOHOL.
four seconds ago i thought “charmed” was a cool show, but now it is back to being a sort of retarded show.
HMM anyway, after the club ended, we sat outside with some random guys and jeanette’s friend stephanie, eating BREAD that daniel got from some random fOol (no one quite knows how)… and uh… sitting there, waiting for someone to sober up enough to drive us home… and then gerrine got a phone call from her sister so she really had to go home, and sherry started driving the car… AND ALMOST KILLED US BY RUNNING INTO THE CURB… so i ended up driving cause i wasn’t sober but i was the sober-est… it’s not a good thing to be drunk-driving, but i must say… it was FUN >__<” like, i was driving the speed limit the whole time (60-65 on highway) but it felt like we were FLYING lol… -__-” weird, man.
today i’ve just been eating and sleeping all day, pretty much D: niceeee. garfield.
december 20th, 2003 (-___-)
i’m listening to… nothing.
i’m feeling… meh.
1:50 am — wOosa, just won $11 offa some people playing poker. ^^ yey ~ ^^
today sherry and jeanette took me out for dinner @ joe’s crab shack (or something) in san francisco. it was alright tasting, kinda expensive :/ halfway thru the meal “staying alive” came on and all of the workers started dancing to it… pretty cool har. they had like a routine and everything. there was a girl who had a birthday @ the table next to us and they made her hold up these little paper wings and strapped a paper beak on her and told her to ‘fly around the restaurant’… i was scared to death but my waitress was nice and didn’t make me do that… she and some other chick just said something like they’ve been working hard on a backwards version of “happy birthday”, and sang “happy birthday” with their backs to us… HAR HAR SO FUNNY… wait, no, not really! D:
we were gonna drink, but no one really wanted to, and i didn’t really feel like it… :/ and then we watched “whale rider” @ jeanette’s house… yea yea yup yup. need to go to sleep because i have to go to church tomorrow or some shit. fucking nuts. shinjineh.
sooo sick of life. -__-’ would be a good day to start and to end, eh. feel soooo… lacking. alone… ALONEEEE.
“why do i even try? i don’t know; it’s all for nothing.”
happy birthday vivian sorry i have nto been able to get out of bed or talk on a telephone:( in fact im getting nauseous right now from benig in front of the compuoer right now without contacts oh fartballs. hope you had a superbulous birgthday
december 19th, 2003
i’m listening to… nothing.
i’m feeling… meh.
1:32 am — meh. -__-” just got back from pc bang and shooting pool with claire, fontaine, jon [toy], kevin, and jimmy… damn, first time i’ve seen that fool jon toy in like… fucking five years or something… CRAZINESS! but yeah, it was cool… always nice seeing old friends whose cars you’ve crashed *cough. :X we played pool for bettin shit but we ended up playing so many games it just ended up “evening out” and playing for betting was pointless in the end. -__-” kinda lame.
claire accidentally backed out into this 4runner or something… she got a dent in her bumper that looks like someone literally shoved their knee into it. the other car was alright, though. and she also got a 4.0 this quarter… without studying or going to class… … … … .. . wtf.
whatever, boring life.
i want a wacom tablet.