recap central: cross-country kamut road trip, day seven: omaha.

(I am currently writing this from Gaia Italian Cafe in Lower East Side, Manhattan. Just the best fucking place, man, and right downstairs from where Jeanette lives. Wish I had found it earlier. I am soooooo into it…!!)

—

ACTUAL DATE OF TRAVEL: MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 19TH, 2011.
SMALL PICTURES WERE TAKEN BY ROSE ON HER IPHONE; LARGE PICTURES ARE MINE.
—

OMAHA, NEBRASKA

Ohhhh so many days in Omaha. After a night out last night, woke up early to go to church. Wooooo! Not exactly my ideal type of church, but it was quite fun nonetheless. But a Monday mass is pretty much guaranteed to be mass with hardcore people, and as my previous trip to a weird Houston Catholic church also revealed…

This was the first time Rose had ever been to church, and man, I don’t know if Catholics just don’t want people to become Catholic or what, but the barrier to entry is set soooooooooo fucking high. It feels seriously that it is impossible for one to just simply jump into Catholicism. There’s not a goshdarn thing to jump into! They go to infinity from the get-go, rushing through just tons and tons of movements without anyone commanding anything, chanting lines here and there that mean Lord knows what; confusing, confusing, confusing!!! At least I still remember the Lord’s Prayer from my days in Catholic elementary school… woOoooOoooOoOo! :L

We went to St. Cecilia’s Church, which is huge, towering, and definitely not the type of church you see frequently in the United States. So it had that going for it. I would post some pictures that Rose took, but honestly, I’m so churched-out at this point in my life that particular church was not particularly all that interesting (it was alright, dude) that generally I am going to stamp a big fat “PASS!” on doing that shit. Boo-hoo-ring.

Let’s talk instead about the service itself, because that’s way more interesting. There were probably like 20 people at mass, with a priest dude who honestly seemed like he was totally a newb and didn’t entirely know WTF he was doing. Pretty sure he stumbled over his words a few times. Also, do they fucking take Communion at every mass? Cause if so, I didn’t know that, or didn’t remember that, and man dudes, that’s just kinda eating up the Lord Jeebus Christ a little too often, isn’t it? He doesn’t even taste that delicious in wafer form.

I refrained from taking Communion even though I’m baptized because I’m so very not into it and no longer feel the need to pretend. Well, that’s kind of a lie. When I went to Israel recently with my parents and a shit ton of the other parents from their church, I did in fact take Communion, though I only took the wine (or was it grape juice? Whatever…) and not the actual host. But that time it was mostly for the peer pressure reasons that led me to sign up to be baptized and to be remain sexually sacred until marriage back in high school… I was always the last one to do both! So… WHUTEVA! I remember there was one older girl in our church, Tammy, who refrained from doing the True Love Waits bullshit, and for sure, everyone whispered and wondered why she chose to make that decision. Judgmental churchgoers? NEVERRRRRR. I can’t say that I didn’t whisper and wonder because I’m quite sure I did or this wouldn’t even be on my mind or in my memory whatsoever, but… so it goes. It’s a natural repressed curiosity to wonder why someone else wouldn’t make the same ridiculous decision as you!

While we were at church, Rose picked up this book when they were reading a verse from Ezra. She thought it was a Bible but it was not; it was some weird book with hymns but also occasional directives. Not really sure what it was. It certainly did amuse me, though, that the verse from Ezra they chose to display basically just talked about how people should donate money. But… of course…

Afterwards, we went to AVANZAAAAA! I was really excited to go to a Mexican supermarket buuuuuut Avanza (2900 Leavenworth St.) was just alright. Been to better ones, bitchez. But what they DID have was a huge cup of fresh flan, made with milk not cream, and I ate the shit out of that for breakfast. A huge cup of flan for like $2.00, for breakfast? TALK ABOUT HEAVEN! HEAVEN FOR A SUGARY FATASS SUCH AS MYSELF!!!!

Beyond that, we went to explore a few places because we had nothing particularly better to do… Starting with the arboreteum area. We actually found it because we got lost, but whatever. It actually cost money so we didn’t go in and ended up at this mini-park with old Union Pacific trains and such… (Omaha being a middle-of-the-country connection point for original trains; it was just about the only thing near where it was). The trains were KINDA interesting just because I had a recent stint being really interested in trains (they’re such aesthetically-pleasing things)… but that’s about it.

Then I guided us to a random downtown park (where Rose learned that the oldest restaurant in town was a Chinese restaurant, and wanted to go there later on…) but yeah. It was a really nice downtown waterfront park they had, and I did a brief, long-overdue meditation there. It was quite good, quite good.

Alright, I guess I will share a couple of my photos since… they exist… (but that’s the only reason).

Not gonna lie; this dude was pretty cool, and like the praying mantis, this was the closest I’ve ever been to a grasshopper and the first time I’ve ever really had the opportunity to study em! It should also be noted that this motherfucker was fucking huuuuuuuuuuuuge!!

A husk of a man.

Then we headed to that oldest Chinese restaurant Rose had seen. It is called King Fong Café (315 S 16th St) and honestly is apparently quite shitty but the history behind it is KINDA cool… it was one of the first places in the States to import these Chinese lantern things and looks very old-school, even with the restaurant being on the upper floor as opposed to the first floor. I don’t doubt it has history but the food is probably MEHHH, with a and super Americanized menu, but the lady was very nice and let Rose snap a whole buncha photographs even though they were closed for lunch. So that was nice. But the street it was on was this weird ass part of town that reminded me a bit of Seattle’s Pioneer Square, only there was nothing really going on and just a whole bunch of somewhat shady people hiding under somewhat shady trees, waiting for the bus or something. Ohhhh the sketchiness of bus malls.

Instead we went to Panda House (301 S. 16th St), where Rose got crab rangoons, and I can bet this place is way better. They defo had some legit crap on their menu, though none of that was ordered (and we had just missed the lunch specials by 3 minutes or something). Because we dilly-dallied a bit, we got a ticket for an expired parking meter, though. But tickets in Omaha are only $15.00…!!!

Randomly found another park downtown soon thereafter. This shit was really fucking cool. It had the most amazing pioneer bronze sculptures ever, which had apparently just been put in in 2009. The detail on them was INCREDIBLE. Seriously. It seemed like they were real. I wish you could see that the wagons had grains, the tools had bolts, the drapery was amazing… everything was just so godamn rad. Definitely one of the coolest parks I’ve been to ever, and I can totally rant and rave about this place, for suuuure.

So fucking epic.

Afterwards, went back home to meet up with Bill and then headed down south to go to the Mexican neighborhood, which, strangely enough, seemed perhaps one of the hippest parts of Omaha, and it was the place with all the thrift stores and such. It had a SHIT TON of restaurants, some of which are supposedly amazing, but because people wanted cheap margaritas, we ended up at a restaurant that was pretty much not good at all, and of course, I don’t drink margaritas. C’est la vie… (here is a pic of the not-so-amazing food, the boys, and the drinks)

Before we went to the restaurant, though, we did go to this place that sold gardening pots for like, the least amount of money ever… it was seriously kind of incredible how cheap this place was… you could buy huge ass ones – you know, those giant planters – for like $20.00 or something. Surely that place is a front! Apparently there are never workers in there! Anyway, these are total Mario boots!

Our horrible “band” photo…

Gotta buncha snacks from the International Bakery (5106 S 24th St.) afterwards, which is a Mexican bakery. Can’t complain. They had these particular cookies and were really dry, and we all know I love a fucking dry cookie. The drier the better. Which I was joking, but I’m notttttttt at all.

A mural from the Mexican part of Omaha, had you any doubts as to its existence or legitity (not a word, but it should be, maybe…)

That night, we met up with SC dude and went to their venue, The Slowdown (729 North 14th St.) and got a tour of it. I mean, honestly, meeting with dude and going to tour the SC stuff is basically the only reason we stayed in town the extra evening, so it is great that it actually lived up to expectations (not that I had any, really, but Rose did) and it was easily the coolest part of our Omaha experience, just cause Slowdown is such a cool space; they really, really put a lot of thought into it and you can tell that from just looking at their setup, their weekly specials, etc. There is, apparently, like a giant 20-foot television; they have room separators so they can cater to large or small shows; the green room is fucking huge and amazing, and with showers; they have beer specials when they don’t have shows that are like $2.00 for anything – domestic or international – that’s on tap, and they have shit like Newcastle on tap, lucky me; etc. etc. The place is just super solid, and visually looks appealing in that typical black-walled venue kinda way. And it’s all-ages, and I guess most good shows that come through town go through there (as they are one of perhaps two venues).

From here I will show Rose’s pics, as I didn’t take any… also learned some more about Nebraskans and football from Jason, which was no doubt interesting… he was talking about how he was in fact super into football when he was going to school in Lincoln, and that the seats there are teeny tiny and are on benches that are marked with spaces (as opposed to being individual seats), and that, as a result, if you have a fat person on either side of you (which, judging from a lot of what I saw of Nebraska, is wholly possible), there’s a good chance that you’d be standing for an entire game because you literally cannot sit. So that’s funny. Anyway. Pics.

[ABOVE] Inside their offices; [BELOW] Jason has a creepy clown thing on his door… it is pretty downright creepy…

Inside their record store… dude, that chair is seriously the most amazing fucking find. You can’t see all of the details, but it has like, a wooden tree trunk base, and is made of upholstered brown leather with tartan patterning? WHAT THE FUCK; IT’S SO COOL! Evidently Omaha is a bedrock of amazing vintage finds, because no one really gives a shit and there is so much of it. I promised I wouldn’t let out the secret. I think I just did…

But yeah, it was pretty cool to see their warehouse and attached store. Rose was like, “Why is there no dedication or commemoration to Conor Oberst in Omaha?!!!” and that’s a funny thought, in general. The closest thing was this wall in the SC record store that had a bunch of old tickets and memorabilia tacked up from the early days of Bright Eyes and other SC bands. I dunno. Amusing…

Anyway, that’s it. Beyond that, I went to bed after doing some work; Rose went out and had a night out on the town with a boy. Snore! Snarf!!

(Side note: I am about to order what I think is an eggplant parmigiana sandwich from that place I said is amazing and I am totally stoked. And jealous that owner speaks Italian and Spanish fluently and owns such a cool place. I am also in major recipe-development mode and have been coming up with some ideas for things… and started practicing yesterday… so when I go home I am just going to be an insane baking fool! Imagine Chinese ingredients mixed with Latin American ingredients – that will about sum up what I’m going for…!!!!! STOKED!!!)

blarbargh blarghath neglecting myself.

in honor of having a real relationship, i have been neglecting myself. i feel good about it, mostly, but for the past couple days i have felt less good about it! i have goals! and it’s easy to get distracted. luckily, my schedule has been more free than usual as of late — primarily due to no longer feeling the burden of heavy social responsibility with regards to many interactions — so it has generally worked out. but i’m getting back to me, at least for this evening, because i’ve realized that i only have two weeks before rose and i embark on this:

this, this, this! what is this? a road trip plan! a plan for a road trip! and it is coming, sooooooooooooooooo ridiculously soon. currently in the process of attempting to find someone to sublet my apartment and/or trade me for two weeks. ideally someone in new york so i would have a place to stay in new york. man, would that be amazing…

the temporary plan is this… (copy and pasted from an email from rose…)

Oregon >
13th – 7.5 Boise, ID *
14th – 5.5 Idaho, SLC
15th/16 – 8.3 Denver, CO *
17- 7.5 Lincoln
18 – 1 – Omaha, NE
19 – 4.5 – Cedar Rapids
20- 4 Chicago, IL – **
21st – 4.5 Ann Arbor, MI
22nd – 1 detriot + 4 Hamilton, Canada
23rd – 4 Niagra / Border Patrol / Syracuse, NY
24th – 5 NY NY NY NY NY NY!!!

honestly, it is all a bit short for my liking and i’d rather just get to new york by the 28th… buuut whatever. it’s kinda crazy that sometime during the past week there was a hurricane warning that turned new york into a potential “state of emergency” and i had heard nothing about it whatsoever! luckily troy actually gives a shit about the news and can tell me things, but as this girl who works at palace — nicole — and i were discussing, it’s very simple to stay in a bubble in portland. neither of us had any clue… it’s so easy to get lost in the micro here, in the everyday routine…

anyway, back to the road trip.

will be staying with brian baker in boise, will be staying with ed and kathy in denver. met a few people this past sunday from ann arbor who might be able to take us around, so that’s potentially exciting — though i think we might be getting in after the guy leaves, which is too bad. but we’ll see! but there seem to be a lot of randoid connections since nim is actually originally from ann arbor.

tonight troy and i watched this movie at grindhouse in hollywood theatre… it was pretty amazing, i must tell you. it’s like a bunch of extremely proper british hippies turned into bike zombies. not even joking. minor touchings-upons on the occult and other ridiculousness. at some point, main character dude was wearing really tight leather pants (of the type i used to have) and a white turtleneck tucked into his tight leather pants. like… really? this is what you’re wearing?

speaking of such… 1) i hope to actually be able to make all freakin’ night in olympia this year after skipping it for the past two years (though i can’t seem to find any information about this year’s online); 2) forget… haha.

other than that… i had my show last thursday.

after all was said and done, it was like ~150 people plus performers, but it felt very full and the vibe was appropriately amazing. i’m so stoked to be in this weird position where i can throw psychedelic shows like this.

the write-up from portland mercury’s up & coming:

INTUITIVE NAVIGATION: GOLDEN RETRIEVER, SWAHILI, MIDDAY VEIL, BILLIONS AND BILLIONS, BLACK SCIENCE
(Holocene, 1001 SE Morrison) Holocene gets dressed up as an empyrean dream world tonight for Redefine magazine’s Intuitive Navigation, a cross-disciplinary indulgence of film, music, dance, wearable sculpture, and art installation. Intended to facilitate a self-reflective state of meditation for the attendee, expect ritualistic performance art and hypnotic stimuli galore. The event will be soundtracked by some of the Northwest’s most prismatic artists, who will perform in costume along with visual artists and dancers to enhance the immersive experience. Take special note of the evening’s headliner, Portland’s best bet for trance-induction: the soporifically zonked Golden Retriever. CHRIS CANTINO

the write-up from willamette week:

[INDISCIPLINARY ART EXPERIENCE] A spinoff of a similar event that happened at Holocene in December 2010, Intuitive Navigation gathers a handful of psych, drone and experimental bands and pairs each one up with a dancer, filmmaker or artist to play with and off one another. Considering the tone of many of the acts—the spacious dreamscapes of Midday Veil, Golden Retriever’s glorious tonal smears and the sharp metallic edges wielded by Black Science—this isn’t a night to be taken lightly or without a little chemical boost to help let the music and visuals take you to a higher plane.

i’m super stoked to be able to throw trippy-ass events. more. to. come. i. hope. i like the schedule right now… every three or so months a new event? sounds good to me, anyway… that’s actually quite a bit! and sure, some are more successful than others, but it’s all in the wrists, kids!

i’m presently watching a documentary of people’s confessions in church… it’s alright. it’s just strange because the people are confessing but looking at the camera, eyes open, while they’re doing it. doesn’t feel like they are talking to a priest, and therefore feels less real. but maybe it is real. it is visually quite appealing, though, in the way that i like to take photography. it’s sad, though, at this point. i don’t really care about photography like, at all. it seems like a dumb thing that anyone can do. its appeal is lost to me, for the mooooooooooost part.

i wanna share some pics from intuitive navigation… but sometime soon. later.

am i thinking critically these days? i am. but every day is no longer a huge revelation.

a couple weekends ago we went to helsing junction, on the farm. it was pretty amazing, but it was also an amount of shroomery of which i have not experienced before. was crippling at some junctures, actually. i think i said to troy a few times, “it’s hard to be much more than a lump,” because that is essentially how i felt. also, bagged pita bread tasted like the grossest thing ever; i could taste the plastic. fresh fruit was not as bad, but i had no appetite, pretty much. was interesting.

at some point, troy and i had been rolling around on gina’s air mattress (hilarious thing to bring) and finally decided to get up and go towards where the people were in the main area. and like five minutes after we got out there, everyone had decided to take a group photograph at the top of this haystack period. it was such good timing, especially since the timing felt arbitrary as fuck. like… there was no reason for that picture to have been happening at that time, really.

we also spent a fair amount of time wading around in the river, which was fun. floating down that river was pretty wonderful, indeeeeeeeeeeeed. what we barely ended up doing — despite the fact that it was a concert — was seeing music. we saw some, for sure. shoulda saw more. or not. but yeah. oh yeah. rose’s sister kathy was in town… and she was really, really awesome. instantly likable. and very mom like. and at some point we were in apple orchards, starting at one and then retreating inwards from the field to escape the sun… just taking over aisle after aisle, like locusts! and luckily kathy was around to clean up our mess a few times, as we blocked off the locations to other people’s tents and stuff. honestly, it was a bit rude, but i was out of it, so.

it dawned on me while i was there that i needed to write back to my prison penpals really soon. it’s been really quite a long time. i need to do that.

i am wanting to go up to seattle this weekend so i can give lenny some money i owe him and also take him to sushi because i had bought him this meal to red fin (expensive and good, supposedly) and it expires next month. sherry just got to singapore. lenny is going later in september. it’s crazy that two of my best friends are going to be in singapore at that time and i can’t even be there. aghhhh! because i need to go on this road trip!!! arggghhhh! this is fine and good, of course, but at the same time, SUCKKKKKKKKKKKKS. but this is what happens. we can’t get everything we want all the time, although i come close! so fine. i can’t complain…

also, today… i won a $50 gift certificate to a restaurant that’s really close by! YEAHHHH! also, tomorrow, we’re going to eat ethiopian food… yeaaaaaaaah! also, tomorrow, we’re going to aquarian, this weird psychic church thing. more on that later.

also, really romped through a whole bunch of korean music videos the other night. some memories, man. here are the songs i dug up this particular time, many of which were like, HOLY SHITTTT…

young turks – ta een (sigh, one of my favorites back then)

lee junghyun – bakwuh

j – like yesterday

sechskies – pomsaeng pomsah

solid – eebameh keuteul japgo (completely forgot about this one)

s#arp – tell me

s#arp – lying

shinhwa – chun il yoo hon

yoo seungjun – gawee

turbo – december (definitely an og favorite, too)

dj doc – l.i.e. (from an album i rocked so hard later on in my kpop phase)

dj doc – bi ae (same as above… gahhh, so good!)

oh yeah, yesterday maddy cut my hair! yay! it’s now really short on one side and i still have what they call “the tusk” on the other side. it’s really long. and then paul read maddy’s tarot at a bar (dig a pony… it’s new and super nice). maddy is leaving soon to move back to minnesota, which is really sad, but it really seems like a good move for her. it seems very positive, and it seems like she knows what she is doing.

sigggggggggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.i wanna travel really bad. and i guess i am, but i mean… internationally.

this movie has really nice symmetries, many of which are images from churches. it’s called “jesus, you know”.

also, the zombie biker movie, “psychomania,” puts this song in my head. (i’ve embedded this video before; this person sucks at spelling and lyrics.)

this is the end of this post. i will stop editing it ad nauseum!

dude i lied, this lady on this film just got real and was like, “he distracts me from my life. he ruins my prayers. help me to forget him. it’s all so difficult. so tremendously difficult. i must make an effort not to kill him. because i have poison. i have poison. i have access. but i don’t want to kill myself either. i am not allowed to. but in the night when i cannot sleep, i imagine how it would be if i were dead. if it would grieve him, if he would be sorry. but thank god the night comes to an end. and when the sun comes up and i leave the house, then thank god, these thoughts fade away.”

cray-crayyyyyyyyyyzy. but interesting. this is the advise she is beseeching jesus for. help her out, brah. guess what’s going on is that her husband is doing the hanky-panky with another lady. a married one! tsk-tsk!

pink floyd pink floyd pink floyd >>>
guns n’ roses guns n’ roses guns n’ roses >>>

this is saturday night! yeahhh! with occasional sprinklings of t. rex and wild beasts!

last night was kinda crazy. went to a couple house parties. saw nurses new material, and it’s fucking awesome. had a really incredible conversation sandwiched between a new age shaman and a future metaphysicist (with my own leanings falling probably directly in the middle). ever fascinating, and so good to be able to go to a goth dance party and be able to have such awesome real conversation. also did a thing i’ve not done before, which contributes to slight confusion, but all is well. i feel like a normal human being again, generally speaking, and this is a plus. there are parallels, in philosophy and temporariness (horrible word), and also the realization that holy shit! cool brain existence! but at the same time, tis not the same, though it is reassuring on some level. word up. vague.

more church critiques.

went to jubilee.
written on may 1st, 2011.

jubilee times tells the church’s news. this church has money. oh man. i am conflicted. they have a freaking box office — that is how much commercialism is involved in this church. yet, at the same time, they have to be applauded for being so transparent, so up-front about their needy desire for money. i also have to respect in many ways a church where the pastor seems to be a REAL person, where the congregation seems to span all socioeconomic levels, where the ministries are in multiple languages… one where those who serve the church are recognized, well, for their talents. in a church like this, a 21-year-old double major in music and psychology at stanford can get a piano/vocal solo of a song he wrote, a graphic designer can be given the chances to create a full-colored magazine. who, in these roles, can complain about these offerings? if i were the middle-aged guitar shredder who hasn’t played in a band for years, why would i complain about being given the opportunity to play to a congregation of thousands while, surprisingly, being given some amount of musical freedom?

but the same problems, as always, remain, manifested in the slow stare of the person net to me when i fail to submit an offering.

journaling: read a portion of the old testament, read a portion of the new testament, pray, write down what god has said to you.

“there are some things you read in the old testament, and are lke, whatever,” says the pastor.

in his sermon today, the idea is to break down the confusing portions — the allegories to agriculture in the old testament, but in journaling — and turning to another man’s word and then drawing conclusions as filtered through our own experiences, what are we left with?

“why don’t we paddle our kids? i don’t care waht the state of california says,” he continues.

everyone is cheering. but he is the delusional thing about a roomful of people cheering about a parent beating his or her children: parent arne’t always right. how can we cheer in times like these? when there is no doubt someone in the crowd who has been beaten and bruised without deserving it? the word of the day is “compassion” — but joking about something like child abuse, which very much affects people in a very real way, is not compassionate. also, the pastor himself has a positive opinion abotu the benefits of beating your child because he felt his grandmama was right. even if she was (she probably wasn’t), that is situational.

“we used to get plowed — if you can be plowed by alcohol, you can be plowed by god,” he says, trying to be funny about his past.

right. this is the top ’40s equivalent to church-going; there is a bunch of cheering to “clever puns” which really aren’t that clever. it is akin to this song i just heard on the radio, which has the lyrics: “sticks and stones can’t break me/ but whips and chains excite me.” on the surface, alright, clever, but really, kind of dumb.

“we’ve got to get you out of here; we have another service,” the pastor concluded after a vapid prayer where they half-assedly laid hands on people. the power of god compells you, only so far as the carefully-watched time dictates, not the power of the spirit.

how are we not living in island universes in this church? i was surrounded by people and no one spoke to me but the one lady behind me, because they had been asked by the pastor to meet-and-greet. sickening, truly.

i am such a hippie it is ridiculous.

i purchased a book for my parents. it’s called 14,000 things to be happy about, and is literally just a list of awesome things for one to be happy about. i am not happy about everything in this book, but there are things i am happy about, in particular.

my parents have a variety of health problems. they are getting old. they are asian parents. they focus only on the negative. i’m ever wanting them to try and find more beauty in life, but i know not how to even really breach this topic in a way they will understand. i have written them a letter this time around, and hope that they will understand it, though i’m not entirely sure. letter as follows. hopefully it works. god. i’m such a hippie. but really. this is what i can do when i have a relationship where i am kind of estranged from my parents… appreciate what they have done yet in many ways cannot stand being around them. not always, but… the number one reason i can’t stand being around them is negativity. they are infected by negativity. my mother, moreso. i just hope that they will be able to find some more positivity as they’re getting older and more feeble. they turn towards god, but they don’t necessarily find long-standing positivity in it, because they’re not finding it within themselves. i want them to be able to find it within themselves…

—

May 2011

Dear Mom And Dad,


Happy Mother And Father’s Day!


I realize that by the time you receive this, Mother’s Day may have already happened, and Father’s Day will not yet have. I hope
you will accept this joint present, as it is a token of my gratitude towards the both of you.

Recently, I’ve come to realize that I am a much more sentimental person than you both are. And I find it rather hard to discuss
these things in person, but I trust all of this will be much more clear in writing.

What I have done is gone through this entire book (in two days…!) -- and I will request Phil to do the same thing -- and marked
down the things I am particularly thankful for. The lines with the green squares represent things I am thankful for while the
ones with the green + marks represent those things I am thankful for, and also remind me of a memory of childhood, of the homes
we’ve lived in, or things we’ve done as a family.

Though this is a present, I have a request for you. I hope you don’t find it stupid, and I really hope you will honor it, both
for me and for yourselves.

Mom and Dad, please go through this book, at your own speed, and mark down the things you are thankful for.

This is, in a way, a philosophy-driven family art project.

The idea behind this is very simple. Everyone makes a special effort to be thankful during Thanksgiving when really we
should be thankful every day of our lives. And not just thankful for the big things, like taking a new breath every morning,
but thankful for the little things that we are constantly taking for granted.

This book will serve as a shared family document, to, in a way, help us learn about one another… the goal is to help us
understand what each of us appreciate about living and the world, as they are no doubt different things… and to visually see
 the things we have in common, the things we all care about in the same way.

To take some samples out of the book of things I’m really thankful for yet don’t think often about: dryer sheets, foreign
stamps, newsstands, the thought of leaving work and going home, giving a speech (that it challenges a part of you that would
not otherwise be challenged!), the act of entering a room and forgetting why…

In every one of these things, one might think it‘s kind of dumb. “Why would I be thankful?” one could ask. but my favorite
author, Vladimir Nabokov, just about sums it up in his book Pale Fire, with this quote:

“What if we awake one day, all of us, and find ourselves utterly unable to read?
I wish you to gasp not only at what you read but at the miracle of its being readable…”

As you guys are getting older, I understand that it might become easier to be bored by things. I hope that this book is
a start to helping you remember that boredom is only in one’s mind. EVERYTHING IS INCREDIBLE.


“C’est l’infini dans le fini.”
(Beauty is the infinite in the finite.
秀麗是無限的在有限。
-- Charles Baudelaire, French poet
(I hope that Chinese translation makes sense…)


Happy celebration of life. I do hope you will enjoy this book and understand that it could be a really cool thing
if you actually do the task I asked!

It requires very little effort, and really, the point is this: there is nothing more important, more healing, more
life-affirming… than appreciating and giving thanks! Hating the negative things is too easy. Let’s focus on the positive.

Thank you for the things you have done and will do.



Love,

Vivian

what a day is.

i recently had this thought — what troy described as a “fight club” kind of moment — what i would only describe as a moment of clarity — however simple it might seem on the surface (it barely sounds like a revelation when written — but my, it certainly feels like one). troy has been ever telling me that time is but a concept — that it is not real — and while my terrestrial mind would be hard-pressed to believe that it is 100% non-existent — there has been a phenomena with me lately where i am discovering the value of what we call “a day” — whereas before i was constantly blathering on about how there are not enough hours in a day, lately i have been discovering that time is eternal? at least much, much more malleable than i had once thought before. when i had this realization it was the feeling that time is simple to manage — that i can practically do everything i want to do all the time. seriously, there are occasional logistical difficulties — i can’t be everywhere all the time or make a car drive the same distance in less time — but i can accomplish so much, and without as much stress as i would have previously thought, ever. i have been hyper-aware of time this past week in new mexico — this mystical land — and this feeling is unshakeable.

ROSWELL -> SANTA FE.
(written in the car, 03/17/11)

april 20th, 2011.
this was all in the car, after i left carlsbad caverns in southern new mexico and drove (yes, i was writing while driving — there was no one on the roads, after all, and it was clear on both sides for miles) from roswell to santa fe.

when i first entered carlsbad caverns, i had run down the entrance to the caves — probably like half a mile — not taking my time, barely noticing anything, really… and just concentrating on the act of walking downhill, stopping occasionally here and there, as people do, to take photographs and not really see. and then, i reached the “big room” (see picture above, which i did not take). the “big room” is a giant room in which there are many, many formations, which are all astounding, and remarkably different. a quarter way through the big room, it finally fucking dawned on me. i am in a fucking cave. a HUGE cave. i’m in a fucking cave, and it’s millions of years old or some shit, i’m not even noticing it at all??????? how am i not noticing it at all??

from that moment, i took my time. and when i left, i stopped by a small trail, where native americans had previously been thought to reside, and i climbed atop a tiny hill. when i got to the top of the hill, i meditated. i had meditated the previous morning and great sand dunes national park, and let me tell you… a morning meditation session in nature is truly like nothing else.

i had a series of revelations upon that mountaintop. they all sound really dumb when written — as many revelations do — but when i was up there, feeling them, it was powerful.

the first had to do with time, as i wrote down later. the second i am not writing until presently…

the second lied primarily in my method of meditation. i was meditating, lost in my own thoughts, til the wind started blowing strongly, and i came half back to reality, in a sense. i was centered in that midpoint which i love so much — between wake and dream. there, i began to look to the wind as an indicator of when i would stop meditating. i had been doing it for a while, and somehow, a rule i had newly formed for myself involved meditating until the wind stopped. it didn’t stop for a long while, and i found myself fixated upon the point of it blowing. upon realizing this, i was a bit soured upon the idea — i was obviously not that deeply entrenched in my meditation — and it dawned on me that i was willing the wind to stop so i could stop. it was just a rule i had made for myself, as i do. but that desire reflected so much a desire i always see and mock in my parents. for example, whenever we go somewhere and the weather is great, they’ll thank god, or whenever we go to a restaurant and a good parking spot opens up, they’ll thank god. i found all of that rather ludicrous, yet i was doing the same thing — albeit in a non-verbal manner — but my thoughts were selfish, and human… i was begging that nature stop for ME, lil’ ol’ me!!, so i could finally cease meditating because of this stupid rule i had invented. how human, and how selfish of me!

realizing that was important, i think. it involved taking nature for granted, in a sense. i am not certain whether my attempts to remedy were laudable, but i attempted to, by thanking the moment, and the situation — simply acknowledging the fact that i am a silly human and that i had made this rule, and sorry nature, but now i will depart, by my own accord, because it was silly of me to expect you to stop for me. thank you nature, i must depart. and then i left, after giving thanks.

wailing wall.

erf. what.

just went to the wailing wall. with zero expectations. and i’d have to say that it is the coolest part about the trip so far. yes, rivaling — and beating — petra.

huh.

maybe the reason for it is that it was more of an introspective time when otherwise the entire trip has been filled with extrospective bramblings. bramble. bumble.

hm. so. going there was pretty powerful. it felt that way. perhaps it was something about thousands — millions? — of people dumping their wishes and wills and prayers and concerns into this inanimate object… i don’t know that i believe in religion, but i certainly believe in the power of will, of souls, of connectivity. and something about that strikes me as extremely powerful, and really, really present at the wailing wall. shit, i didn’t realize WHAT the wailing wall was, or that it was even in israel. i had only heard of it by name before.

heading up to the wall, it is separated by men and women. men and women cannot pray with one another. it is customary, i guess, to walk away from the wall backwards, with your back away from it. i thought that was stupid. did not comply. maybe it was rude to say that i thought it was stupid, but i say stuff. oops.

… started walking up to the wall and the whole left side of it is the gates that separate the men from the women. alongside that are tables, with chairs, and tons of people sitting by themelves with their bibles or torahs, studying, reading, meditating. then you approach, and many people are doing the same. many are rocking back and forth, mumbling, praying, crying. … .. . even getting close to the wall felt really powerful. a looming presence. a present presence. whatever it means…

i didn’t have a prayer in mind. didn’t even know people prayed there. hell, i haven’t prayed since like, early college. i stared at the wall and considered three sentences that came to mind then and there, and kept them in my mind, and just decided to ramble out whatever else came beyond that. i forget what those three sentences are at this moment. it was almost as if i said all of these prayers and exorcized them from my soul and barely can remember fragments of them now. sherry and i were joking before approaching the wall that we would be praying about world peace and saving the environment, and funny as that is, that’s pretty much exactly the things i prayed about. albeit not in any particularly cheesy sense like that… mostly i prayed for human beins to gain understanding, and openness… to find importance in mathematics and patterns and underlying building blocks in the universe… and most of all, to understand ourselves so that we can spread that understanding outwards. evidently, myself in this stream of consciousness prayer believed that understanding was the ultimate key to, i guess, peace? there was visualizations — waves of energy, radiating outwards.

soon, sherry mentioned that she wanted to approach the wall, which is actually quite difficult considering how crowded it was. you basically had to wait a turn to get close enough to touch it. sherry went first, and came back and told me i should definitely go. i went the next time it opened up…

close to the wall, you can seriously hear wailing. from multiple directions… and even so far as multiple people away. very intense. everyone has her own style of wailing, of course… some mumble, some sob quietly, some cry noisily… .. . and it almost puts you in this trance-like state to be there, amongst all these tears and all this sorrow… again, wasn’t necessarily expecting to pray, but once i got there, i had to. leaned against the walls, and prayed… to nobody in particular… to just a universal energy force… and i prayed hard. got mazed, the physical world falling away… there was nothing but sound — sound and the fury of extending a will.

surrounded by all this sorrow, and with no plan in mind, the first words in my meditations were pretty much, “why all this sorrow” repeated over and over and over, like a mantra. it simply could not be helped. it tumbled out. and then… a general wish for people to attain what they wanted… not what they thought they wanted, but what they really truly wanted… that human beings as a whole would simply learn to go with the flow, to accept life more readily… and that that would yield a synchronicitous reality that made apparent — and granted — what was wanted. and beyond this… again… with the visualizations… a sweeping, swooping orange-tinted force, radiating outwards, scooping up everyone in the wall and bringing them inwards, and then to the entire courtyard, and then to the entire country, and then to the entire world, from a globe’s point-of-view.

what the fuck. i don’t even know. got mazed so hard.

but that is only from a spiritual aspect. later on, we went indoors and underground to check out some parts of the old town, and it was INSANE to see how far down the original streets that jesus christ SUPPOSEDLY walked on (there’s an endless amount of conjecture with no real fact…)… cause at the time of christ, to two thousand years later to 2011… debris and natural build-up puts buries the original land beneath a HUGE amount of sendiment. it’s crazzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzy to actually see.

fuck. trippiest night. easy. and it also led the brain to spin off on a bunch of other tangents, including thoughts about my parents, and tons about mortality, in general, and how much i hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate fucking hate religion and wished that i had prayed for some kind of religious unification cause this shit is fucking stupid. as it goes.

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESH.

summaries.

i’m listening to… colin stetson’s New History Warfare Vol. 2: Judges — it’s crazy fucking saxophone music. pretty cool but this particular song is making me kind of crazy (one can only handle so much crazy ass saxophone music at once).

quick summary of the past couple days:

- robby just gave me a tape of denton bands that he made me for my birthday! i only write this first because it’s sitting right next to me.

- got a sxsw venue, it looks like, to throw a show for the first time ever. more details forthcoming, but if all things go as planned, it’s going to be pretty sick.

- got a couple new writers for redefine. heck yes.

- protested at an anti-abortion parade (puny, at 60 people), where people made signs and danced to a boom box (including ace of base). funny things related to that:
a) i went into planned parenthood to ask for a marker because i didn’t necessarily like what my sign said. i asked, “do you guys have a marker?” and the lady at the reception said no. then i asked, “can i borrow a pen, then?” and she’s like, “what are you doing, exactly?” and i told her we were there to support planned parenthood, and she’s like, “OH, OF COURSE I HAVE A MARKER!” and threw a sharpie at me. i lost the sharpie five minutes after going outside. i still don’t understand where the fuck it went… unreal…
b) there was a lady with a sign that said something like, “planned parenthood hurts blacks,” and i was like, “what the fuck? i need to know what this is about.” so i asked her, and she told me that three times more black babies are aborted than white babies… which, even if true, is hardly… proof… anyway, she said that planned parenthood hates blacks and that its founder (margaret sanger) hated black people and was racist and was trying to kill them all through abortion. she gave me a huge newspaper thing. you can search for stuff regarding it, but the websites are rather flawed and use hilarious logic, like, “Blacks make up 12% of the population, but 35% of the abortions in America. Are we being targeted? Isn’t that genocide?” hilarity.
c) i went to a party at dan [s]‘s that night, and randomly started talking to this guy named nathan. nathan and i just started talking immediately about, “what did you do today?” even though i’d never met him before, and he told me about his day, and i told him about mine and said that i went to a pro-life rally to protest, and told him that the signs we made said, “honk if you’re pro-choice,” but i guess he had already assumed that i was pro-life or something, and was just like, “i don’t… really… agree with that politically.” and i was just thinking, “what? is he pro-life?” while at the same time he was like, “she’s pro-life?!! whattttt?!?!!” haha. really funny miscommunication…

- continuing on with the dance party, had a really good plan, and loosely made pals with rose’s best friend, and we are supposedly going to go to the salton sea when i go down to los angeles in july for wedding action. i hope it happens. I WANNA GO TO THE SALTON SEA, DAMMIT.

- after sxsw, i have a flight booked to fly back from albuquerque on march 31st. i will be leaving austin on march 21st, which gives 10 days. during these ten days, IF my prison penpal says that i’d be able to visit him on the 22nd, i will take a greyhound from austin to lawton, oklahoma, and visit him. this is the pricey route, but if he happens to be able to take visitors that day, i kind of have to… if he CAN’T take visitors that day, i’m probably going to ride with the brainstorm dudes to marfa, texas, and then they’re heading to los angeles, and i’ll probably stop off at las cruces and take a greyhound from las cruces to albuquerque cause that’d be wayyyyy more affordable.

- watched a pedro almodovar movie, “talk to her”. it was pretty excellent, and i found my spanish aural comprehension skills were pretty alright.

- just went to eat dinner with christian at the santeria, and we embarrassingly practiced speaking in spanish for almost all of the conversation, and i discovered that my spanish is really godamn bad, and that the santeria IS SO FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOOOOD.

- went to the beach for a day with jay and james. they’re taking off to go back to north carolina soon… the beginning of february, to be exact. they went to the party last night but i didn’t have too much of a chance to talk with them. mer… but yeah, the beach. we went to cannon beach, which was only 15 miles from where aaron and them are renting out a cabin in manzanita to record their next album, but unfortunately, since i wasn’t driving, i couldn’t get out there. which is kind of a bummer

- i am going to the forest tomorrow with rose and troy. yess! forest! and i’m going to make twice-baked potato with onion and cabbage, since i have a buncha leftover onions and potatoes… weird stuff.

- this morning i tried to make this weird ass dish for research club, but i’ve never worked with cottage cheese before. twas a little weird. i threw in a buncha oranges into cottage cheese and then put cucumber, and the cucumber totally ruined it. then i took the cucumber out and added a buncha chocolate to try and fix it, and it was not really fixed. though i just came back and tried it and it tastes WAY better now, so maybe it just had to sit for a bit!

- i was invited by tori to participate in an art show she is throwing at the end of the month. here is my description write-up to her (christian is going to help me do a sound clip):

Earlier this month, I did a day of blindness… it was remarkable in some ways, though I think a day is too long. But I think it’s something most everyone should experience. I have this crazy blindfold thing that blocks out light COMPLETELY. I want to give five-minute blindness “tours”, in which, in an ideal world, I will:

{1} Make up a t-shirt that says, “Follow me for a blindness tour.” to try and bring mall-goers to the gallery (ideally);

{2} Offer four separate tours… SCENT / SOUND / TASTE / TOUCH… I’ll bring all necessary sound samples and maybe try and attain permission from Body Shop to bring people in there if people choose SCENT;

{3} Collect money for donation to Guide Dogs For The Blind or Oregon Council Of The Blind or something else similar (need to do more research in the possibilities);

{4} Bring in a blind or sighted individuals from one of those organizations to talk to people and answer questions about blindness.

- fun conversation with shawn:

Me: “I have more leftovers than Jesus.”
Shawn: “Jesus is leftovers.”
Me: “That doesn’t even make sense.”
Shawn: “Yes, it does.”
Me: (thinking about it) “I guess you’re right.”
Shawn: “Jesus is bread.”
Me: “And Jesus came back from the dead!”

edit @ 3:47am:
after getting enraptured by music and going to bed with music blasting, i woke up a little bit ago. am talking to lenny right now and thought i would add an addendum that describes just what happened to me when i walked home today: i was walking home and i saw this guy turning the corner and i felt like there was something off but wasn’t sure what, and i walked closer and he was like jacking off with his penis through the hole, and i was just like, “what are you doing!” and he was just looking at me. and he was like same-aged (which is perhaps the most disturbing part). this is the second time i’ve been walking home from downtown and avoided any problems downtown but ran into problems in the “safer neighborhoods”. last time, some car was yelling at me from across the street, at a stop sign, and then i waved cause i’m a weirdo, and they pulled up next to me, and i was like, “what the fuck? no.” and kept walking and the guy in the passenger’s seat was just a dude that was texting, and they stopped for a sec, and drove off again. weird.

s p a c e

on the up and up.
on the let things go.
on the let things flow.

i will control only as much that is in my control.
all is well.

“Spirituality means waking up. Most people, even though they don’t know it, are asleep. They’re born asleep, they live asleep, they marry in their sleep, they breed children in their sleep, they die in their sleep without ever waking up. They never understand the loveliness and the beauty of this thing that we call human existence. You know, all mystics — Catholic, Christian, non-Christian, no matter what their theology, no matter what their religion — are unanimous on one thing: that all is well, all is well. Though everything is a mess, all is well. Strange paradox, to be sure. But, tragically, most people never get to see that all is well because they are asleep. They are having a nightmare.”
- Anthony de Mello

recap central: cash only road trip, day two: yuma, jerome.

sunday, march 14th, 2010.

the day started out with us in yuma. this is what i woke up to, and while i was still sleepy in the frigidness, it was way too beautiful to not want to capture with my camera. i woke up quite a bit earlier than the boys and just kind of hiked up to the top of this nearby mini hill which was all compacted sand. it was really fascinating because i’d never studied terrain like that in-depth before. it was also extremely quiet — no one else in the campgrounds was up yet — and i saw some road runners. the sound of birds chirping, of bugs flying… the calmness… it was really, really calming and great as the sun poured in slowly. i slept the evening in the car. it was pretty cold and really uncomfortable, so i didn’t sleep that well. later, we found out that tim had borrowed kevin’s sleeping bag liner thing which was paper thin, but he didn’t sleep IN it… he slept on it. or something weird like that. pretty funny.

good morning, kev.

good morning, tim.

good morning, koury.

some of the terrain.

first thing on the agenda: to find a diner to eat breakfast at! we ended up at penny’s diner (1731 south sunridge dr., yuma). it’s a pretty nice diner and you can’t really miss it from the outside, because it’s like, all metal! it’s not hot inside like i was wondering about guess they knew what was up with insulationz.

here are the pictures lifted from our cash only blog. these are koury’s iphone photos of our food…

kevin’s biscuits and gravy.

koury’s something gnarly with gravy.

my english muffin with awesome hash browns with peppers and onions (a non-ghetto picture, cause bish, it was my food!).

the conclusion was that tim’s meal “lost”.

churreh paiiii!

random pit stop.

we had kevin’s digital camera set up on the dash. he had a canon sd-something, which he had hacked so that it could take time-lapse photography. so the window needed to be at least somewhat clean.

another random pit stop. “don’t scare them away!” koury said, as i walked closer to the sheep. i scared them away — i did. i didn’t know that sheep actually do behave stereotypically like sheep — as in, like fucking idiots. they’re so stupid, and they’ll follow each other in their stupidity! one moved and the whole herd moved away with their back to us. ughhh!

it was sunday, so it was fairly hard to find yard sales, but we had to try. we picked up some local rag and attempted to find a yard sale and found one. took a really bumpy route to get there, and it was a little ways out of town, but we made it. here’s the thing i typed on kevin’s iphone while on bumpy road (taken from our blog):

hi there – this is the highest tech roadtrip ever. Currently we are on a dirt road- Kevin has named it 4326- one mile from a yard sale we found in a local print publication in Yuma. I am posting a real text post- barring intense cat sickness- i mean car sickness- because these joker boys just post pics with their fancy iPhones. They don’t talky talk. Paula Abdul is breaking it down on tim’s car, tiffany, ‘s radio. We spent a good hour setting up our tents in the dark last night in the dark. We ate greasy food at penny’s diner this morning. We went to salton sea and Bombay beach last night. No myths- there are beaches made up of pretty much mashed up fish bones and scales- all dried up, poopy, grey and crusty. There was also a dead pelican that had its wings fallen off. But it’s not all bad news. Shit ton of live pelicans- dozens and dozens really (and it’s a weird sight to see that many live pelicans in the wild, believe me) and we went to the ski inn (see previous posts) where Anthony bourdaine had been – and the people were amazingly nice. Shot pool, bought some fish assholes, and tim boogied down with Ray Davis? An old black guy who could barely talk he was sp drunk, but he definitely looooved music and could most definitely pop and lock in his day. Anyway. Too much typing. Until next time. My lack of iPhone and wifi renders me useless for pics. So I shalt useth ze words instead. Happy living.

here’s the ad that showed what was up with the yard sale, from tim’s iphone.

the couple (eddie and gigi — koury’s pic) used to live in northern california and were christians. they said they used to “have fun” before they were christian (no sex or drugs, the lady said, even though i doubt that, considering they were in rock bands). they were mostly very nice but had basically moved to arizona to get away from hypocritical religious folk. well, well. i found some disney records that were way cool as well as this crazy golden rain coat thing that was way too big, but it was funny, and like, $1, so i bought it. i got rid of it somewhere in texas, by putting it on top of a trash can… hopefully someone else got a kick out of it. it was way good later on in the road trip, but certainly not piece of material to keep for a long period of time (although… thinking back now, i really should have kept it and had jennie turn it into a fucking dope cyber dress or something. but oh well… no foresight at the time — just too many things to carry…). anyway, of course this christian couple pulled the, “oh, are you christian? no? i hope you find god,” crap. she asked kevin if he was religious, and he politely lied and said that he was no longer practicing. i just said no, pretty much. cuz whatever. i don’t need people telling me i need religion, necessarily. we left after a REALLY long time because they were very kind and friendly.

random photo shoot on a military cannon in yuma. this is koury’s photo.

i think on the way to this place, we stopped by a leather shop, which was pretty fucking gnarly. they had like… fox heads. just the skin and fur on the heads… and i asked the people who worked there what people used that shit for, and they said, “oh, everything,” like putting it on shoulders of jackets and on belts and stuff. gag and a half.

we stopped by this random town (gladden, arizona) and went to the bar there, called ree’s outback, because it claimed to have shitty service and food, and that would make it a dive, right? unfortunately, it was the super opposite. the chick who worked there was waaaaaaaaay nice and i think maybe a little intimidated by the boys. there was also a dude sitting at the bar, and he seemed like a “sleeper,” the boys said, as in, a guy who wouldn’t talk to us or really be interested in talking to us. actually, they were quite wrong. like all of the other elderly men we would pass on our travels, he talked to me first. i don’t remember what he began talking to me about first exactly, but it was something inane, no doubt. he then went on to talk about how much he hates southern california — which i can relate to, no doubt… and i’m not sure what else he said. his name was gary. his face was hairy.

they did have this leet ass popcorn machine, though.

the inside of this place. it’s pretty damn cute.

chairs at a random pit stop.

random pit stop: cactus-style!

we passed by these cactuses forever, and finally i just couldn’t take it anymore. i just fucking HAD to take pictures of them. the way the sun was shining on them was way too beautiful not to. we were totally in a rush to get through sedona during sunset, but it was impossible. so, unfortunately, though i have now driven through sedona, i still haven’t seen it. at all. gotta go to arizona again… i rather love the southwest.

yeah!

double yeah!!!!!! maybe with a capital YEAH!

finally, after sundown and massive driving, we got to jerome, arizona. jerome, arizona, is where maynard james keegan of tool lives. no joke. should it be published? well, it doesn’t really matter, cause hardcore tool fans probably already know that. it was publicized, i guess, in a video (hell, i just checked wikipedia, and it’s written on there, so it’s all good) about his wine company — yes, he has a wine company…

we went to this really fucking amazing italian restaurant. this was their bruschetta. a horrible picture, but whatever. it was amazing food. the owner talked to us for a long time because he used to be involved in the music industry. he didn’t tell us who he was and basically said he went to jerome to hide out, but if he wasn’t a big fat liar, he definitely has worked with some huge music-industry names. he seems legit, for sure. and his restaurant is brilliant… so freaking delicious. then we had some amazing pizza, and it was all amazing! such cool elderly people we met in arizona!

after that, we went to the spirit room, which was down the street. and played pool. of course. it would have been nice to stay longer in jerome, but alas. we had schedules to keep to (and we ran late… really late).

brilliant.

koury was watching me take photographs and said he learned things from my style of shooting. which is interesting. not sure what that meant, exactly.

tim being a super creeper. but i love this photo…

we got a hotel that night. splurged! it was just way too cold in the high desert to camp outside, and we didn’t have a campground slotted, so we drove around for a while trying to find one. there was one we stopped at, and kevin ran out, and there was this HUGE neon sign that turned off when he went and knocked on the door. like, not even slyly. they just straight turned off this huge neon sign exactly when kevin knocked. horrible.

we ended up at a pretty nice hotel and kevin and i went in first and snuck the others in. it worked beautifully! and it was nice to have some creature comforts, considering none of us had slept all that well the previous night. but it was only just beginning… i don’t remember what city we ended up in for the night, unfortunately. generally pretty sure we booked it to flagstaff. yeah, that’s where we were. i think?

tim sleeping.

here’s tim’s diatribe on the two types of elderly people we met in arizona and how they’re different. not my sentiments, at all, but interesting nonetheless.

and check out this hilarious quote from koury.