i’m listening to… … kind of like spitting, hellogoodbye, death cab for cutie, michael bubble, the vells, keith urban, blood brothers, kanye west, sufjan stevens.
i’m feeling … hokai.
rofls hae pueple text is lenny
4:46 pm — i shoulda written in this the day after we came back, but i wasn’t feeling like writing in it, unfortunately. SUE ME. but now is the time to write. weeeee. bring it awn!
so we woke up @ like 10 on saturday morning but didn’t leave til like noon to go to canada.. it was me, lenny, arlen, and farm. stopped by the mcdonald’s and the 7-11 to grab some phat disgusting unhealthy eatz(vee’s choice of tims cascade was jalepeno while mine was the superior wasabi flavor), wewt wewt. DOWN WITH MCDONALD’S GIFT CARD SLOGAN: “it’ll not only give you good food, but good times!” SHUTUP. SINCE WHEN DID MCDONALD’S GIVE ME GOOD TIMES?! maybe if good times = heart attacks and fatty fats, bitch! i got apples from mcdonalds!
anyway. so i drove the however long it took to get there and was … so sleepy. so very sreepy. :[ T__T and everyone else in the car was sleeping. teh bastards. got to the border and everyone else had birth certificates (DUDE LENNY HAD A BIRTH CERTIFICATE THAT’S LIKE A CREDIT CARD, WTF!) and i only had a liscense… the lady said we might get some trouble on the way back (which makes sense, sorta, since anyone can get a liscense)… but yeah. let us in. the lady was like the american border inspection people are anal! you could be held up for 4+ hours ect ect, we were scared
first thing was did was exchange some money at the tourist booth. I found some cool rock salt on the ground and put it in mah pocket! la la la. but much to our discontent, MY CAR WOULD NOT START. we sat there for like a half hour waiting for it to start. went inside after a while to try and call for a tow truck, but most of them were like AAA, where you need to be a member. the guy there was trying to call around and find a place for us, but luckily, since we popped open the hood for a while and it got to cool down a little, and it finally worked… after numerous failed attempts!!! hurrah, though.
didn’t want to stop the car again, but we had to at the hostel. drove the half hour or hour or whatever that it took to get to the hostel in mid-vancouver. didn’t know where to park, so we parked in this one lot without paying, but it was like… $3 per hour from 6pm to 6am or some bullshit. so i’m like, FUCK THIS SHIT. so we went inside, got our room, and then came back out to move the car. once again, the car did not work. bitch. so we waited around for another while and went to chinatown to walk around. but then i decided chinatown was boring, cause all it is is like 50 dry goods shops, 50 fruit shops, 50 pastry places, 50 roast meat places. sick!!! and unexciting!! i wanted to go to the underground shoppig mall, but we ended up not going, since when we were leaving chinatown, MY CAR WOULDN’T START AGAIN! we decided it needed a break, and went to the holiday inn down the street from our hostel, cause the hostel front desk lady said we should go there to park since it was $13 for 24 hours. excellent.
afterwards we started walking from our hostel (which was #13somethingsomething on granville st.) to shabusen (which was #2993 or something on the same street). unfortunately, i am n00b, and i directed us in the wrong direction. didn’t realize it until we got to like #600-something. so. we had already walked like a half mile, and we had to backtrack to walk three miles in the other direction to shabusen… ROFLS. it seemed like it took sOo long. i think it took at least an hour and a half or something. good exercise though! i guess?!
went to eat and we didn’t make a reservation, but we lucked the hell out because it was 7 or something, and someone who was supposed to show up @ 6:30 but never did. so the guy gave us a table, saying that we HAD to be out at 8:30. and he kept checking up on us every so often. MOTHERFUCKER!!! but yeah, the food was fucking GLORIOUS. i’m dreaming about it right now :0 i wish i could eat it! it’s basically just sushi and fried rice and REALLY GOOD tonkatsu and more junk and food and tofu and food and sushi. actually, we were kinda weak sauce with the eating and really did not eat that much. i’m rather disappointed with myself. but mmm spicy shrimp rolls for the win… although the all-you-can-eat sushi place in hawaii is much better. cause it had soft-shelled crab rolls 8( and a cute waiter. and potato hand. and giant bag of ice :0 but god, shabusen’s tonkatsu was… REALLY good. yummyyyyyyy.
ANYWAY moving on. as we were leaving, we ran into jun and lewis, which was pretty much FREAKY. they didn’t make a reservation and shit, so i wonder if they ever got in. they were with their RO guild or something — like 10 people or some shit.
on the way back we stoppd by this coffee place called blenders or something. farm got a hot cocoa and WHOA you can pick white chocolate, milk chocolate, and dark chocolate. HOW FUCKIN AWESOME!>?!!? so lenny and i decided to get one, only i wanted to try the orange hot chocolate one, and lenny thought it was pretty gross, and i thought it was okay, but it kinda made me sick… ROOFLS.
we walked back the two and a half miles to the hostel wee, and it was a helluva lot faster than the way there, although it was just about the same distance! lenny kept picking up the pieces of salt they spread on the ground and kept it or something. i think he thought about taking it home to make ramen with it.
on the way back, we walked over this giant bridge, and farm and arlen were walking ahead of us and this cop car stopped right next to em… we thought they were gonna talk to them or something, but they didn’t. behind the cop car stopped a counterterrorist van thing… we concluded someone was going to try and blow up the bridge. EXCELLENT. only, it never happened. too bad. but it mighta! and maybe they caught it JUST IN TIME WEWT WEWT.
we stopped by this sex shop on the way back. didn’t buy anything, except lenny bought two condoms cause he felt bad for going in and not buying anything or whatever. the shop owner loved corny jokes. corny corny. i don’t remember any of them except for the one he asked lenny before we were leaving. he told him to imagine he had two dice. “what number did the first one roll?” he’d ask, and lenny said, “three.” “did it remind you of your first sexual experience?” and he said, “no.” then he told him to imagine what was on the other die. the number was four. same thing. and then he told him to roll both of them together. and was like, “does THAT remind you of your first sexual experience?” ROFLS. you have to picture it to get it, i guess! 
then we went to this arcade, which was the weirdest thing because most of the people in it were GIRLS. WTF. weird. one of these old ladies was supposedly giving farm lesbian eyes. they had time crisis three, which after 80 years, i am still determined to beat. GODAMNIT. i swear, if i had five dollars to waste on that fucking game, i would have long beaten it. but i always play like two or three bucks and never get through it. godamnit. some guys were taking pictures of the screen for an art project supposedly (i’m not sure what kind of supposed art project that is), but they were playing so shitty. i seriously wanted to volunteer to help them beat the game, cause they put in like $5 worth of coins for what would normally take $1. st00pit.
there was also a karaoke booth HAHA. it was just like going to noraebang, cept it was a little room. they also had a buttload of sticker machines, which cost like $8 each now, WTF. i remember when they were $3 and i thought, WTF HOW ARE THEY SO EXPENSIVE?!!! i can’t even fathom paying $8 for that fucking shit! there was also some weird samurai shooting game where you go around shooting ninjas and tetris, bubble bobble, beatmania, guitar / drum games, ddr, pump it up, etc. etc.
after we got bored of that area, we decided to head to the other arcade down the street. this one had a sign outside saying “men’s theatre” or something, and it was decidedly LESS exciting and MORE dirty. god. in the back, there were like 8 white booths and if you put in a quarter, you get a one minute clip of porn. sick. there was also a strip poker game which i won two hands of, but one quarter only gave you two hands, so that’s as naked as the girl got. retarded. it was like, from the 70s too. haha.
there was also the classic area 51 there… tetris again, and some hunting games. i’ve come to the conclusion that i would seriously be good at shooting guns. i swear i need to try sometime… although i’m against guns and all… i still think i would be a really good shot, and i’d like to test it sometime. :0
but yeah, that place smelled like BO. too many dudes, and lots of greasy ones :0
afterwards we walked around a little bit more and lenny got a crepe, but there wasn’t really much else to do since we were poor and underdressed, so we went back to the hostel. they gave us a coupon each for a free beer, but for some reason, none of us redeemed ours (well, i wouldn’t have, but everyone else should’ve!). we chilled around the lounge for a while… lenny and i tried to play pool but didn’t want to pay money to play. just tried shooting the ball around, really. lenny’s never played pool before really. then we just started working on this 1,000 piece puzzle where a shitload of pieces looked the same (it was of a marina, with like tons and tons of boats) and a bunch of pieces that DIDN’T fit FIT. ghetto puzzle!!! :X we spent like 3 hours and got like oh, i dunno, 200 pieces or something done. talked to random hostel folk here and there along the way. one fobby chinese guy who had been living there for like a month and a half, some guys from eastern canada, and yeah… there were a couple of aussies looking to see if this certain door was locked, and lenny’s like, “it’s locked; i already tried.” and i guess they were like, “how would you know? guess everyone’s lookin for a place to shag,” and lenny’s like, “yea,” and apparently they gave me a weird look or something! i’m too young to be shaggin omg!
finally we went to bed and woke up the next day to go to stanley park. arlen asked why it was called stanley park, and i told him it was named after vancouver’s founder, mark stanley. he believed me. ROFLS. owned. arlen was quite gullible that day and believed a lot of lies.
before going there, however, we stopped by chinatown and picked up some roast duck, some buns, and some roast pork (SICK — GREASE CENTRAL!!). i didn’t eat any of that shit; i only ate part of a zhongzi… and it was fine. we ate it in the middle of the park on some benches… it was excellent. i kept thinking frost on the ground was snow, cause it was fucking thick. wish it coulda snowed.
finding stanley park was a bitch cause there was only one exit from one direction, and if you missed it, you had to cross this bridge into north or eastern vancouver. and we missed it at first, so we found a gas station in northern vancouver or whatever, and bought some coolant for my car. AND THEY HAD BANANA MILK YAY. it was like this little mini-jug (like a miniature gallon jug)… so CUTE. and so NUMMY. we drove back across this bridge but i thought there’d be two exits from this direction when there was only one. MISSED THE EXIT AGAIN. had to turn around AGAIN to enter the park. after the park, we just drove to richmond. would have been nice to hang around the park, really, but i guess it was just cold and… i dunno, i guess we really should have. stanley park is MASSIVE yo. MASSIVE.
at richmond, we just went to this daiso store and bought some random crap. it was in this mall that had a LOT of really bad asian drivers. GO RICHMOND, ASIAN CENTRAL, AKA BAD DRIVER CENTRAL!!!!! we were throwing quarters from the second story into this fountain on the first story (above that they had like, a planetarium ceiling, omg!) and we were throwing it rather far, but farm threw one that landed like right behind this guy’s head. funny to see them all bewildered! and i left my mini-jug of banana milk IN THE TOILET. NOOO.
after leaving, we stopped by a gelato place and ate some ice cream. lenny’s first time having gelato, and i think arlen’s too. yummy nummy in my tummy. the difference between gelato and ice cream: instead of using heavy cream, gelato uses non-fat or low-fat milk. NOW YOU KNOW. and then we came home :0 on the way back, lenny drove, and there was some weird ass filipino guy who had a power trip, and he’d be asking us questions (farm and i), and we’d answer him, but he wouldn’t hear us, and he’d be like screaming, “answer me when i’m talking to you!” and he tapped on the car to… check for drugs? who knows, yo.
oh yes, the day before this trip, i went and bought farm an engagement ring from arlen because arlen is a carless scrub!! wewt wewt. i still have it — it needs to be returned — but did you know that they only make rings in size 7?! how freakish. so you’re like… REQUIRED to change the size. those jackasses. who the fuck has size 7 fingers?!
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The Drake Hotel is a nice ass venue, like the fucking Doug Fir, kinda. I get a payout this evening, woo!! Eat fries and gravy for dinner next door at some place.
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